Making Hannukah Spiritual

Candles for Those I Love



Hannukah doesn't seem to me an overtly spiritual holiday. And it isn't even in the Jewish Bible. Or in the Protestant Bible. It's found in the apocryphal books which Jews and Protestant Christians rejected, and which found their way only into the Catholic Bible.



You probably know the story - the Temple was desecrated by the Greeks and when Judah Maccabee and his brothers entered the sanctuary to light the ner tamid, the eternal flame, there was only enough oil to burn for one day. He lit the flame and the miracle happened: the menorah burned for eight days, long enough to replenish the supply.



If you know me, have heard me speak, or read my books, you'll know I don't take the Bible literally. So during Hannukah, not only do I look for ways to make this story meaningful, I also look for ways to make the rituals of the holiday meaningful.



For years, after the candles were lit, Joe and I would sit close, gazing at the flames while playing Debbie Friedman's beautiful Hannukah song:



Oh hear my prayer. I sing to you. Be gracious to the ones I love. And bless them with goodness and mercy and peace. Oh hear my prayer to you.



Let us light these lights and see the way to You.



Some nights, as we sing, we weep. We miss the ones we love. We hope that the feelings in our hearts evoked by the beautiful melody somehow drift over the miles and into the hearts and lives of our family and friends.



But beyond our family and friends..... let us...see the way to You. My heart leaps upward, yearning to connect more deeply with the Divine. I feel God's presence wash over me.



Several years ago, Joe and I began to collect hannukiot (plural for hannukiah). A hannukiah is a special menorah, one that holds eight candles, rather than the traditional seven, and also has a raised "cup" for the shamash, the candle with which you light the other candles. Candles are placed in the hannukiah from right to left, and lit from left to right, thus lighting the candle that corresponds to the current day of Hannukah.



This year six beautiful, unique hannukiot lined the balcony platform, the first thing you see when you walk in our front door. The one that tended to burn longest, we placed in the kitchen window, and Joe climbed a ladder each night to light the oil-based wicks in our largest hannukiah, the one we placed in the window cove above our front door.



On the last night of Hannukah, we took turns lighting each candle on each hannukiah. As I lit the first candle, I whispered the name of a niece with a drug addiction, the second, a grandchild struggling to fit in at school, the third, my daughter-in-law's mother who has just been diagnosed with lung and throat cancer, and so on.



Joe lit the candles on the next Hannukiah. My mother-in-law, who just turned 90 and needs physical strength, a friend who has breast cancer, me, just because he loves me.



We lit candles for the three parents and one step-parent who have passed away, verbalizing our hope that their souls are journeying more deeply into the Divine. Names came up that needed healing energy, physically or emotionally or spiritually, and there were those for whom we lit a candle simply because they are closest to our hearts.



Although we've always sat for a few quiet moments just basking in the soft light of the candles, followed by a heartfelt singing of our favorite Hannukah song as we thought of our family, this was the first year that we've lit a candle while specifically mentioning the names of our loved ones and it added an amazing depth to this holiday.



On the last night, after all the candles were lit, we stood beneath them, looking up, singing, when suddenly I felt something beyond a mere connection to an old tradition. I saw beside all of those candles the faces of those I love and their presence filled the room. So many sweet lives burned in that room and in our hearts.



Oh hear my prayer. I sing to you. Be gracious to the ones I love, and bless them with goodness and mercy and peace. Oh hear my prayer to You.